Last week contained Valentine’s Day, and because there is nothing that people love doing more than sitting around, at home, with their date and watching TV instead of being romantic in the hopes of getting laid, almost every show ran some kind of holiday special. I am sure that the core audiences of these shows are single men crying themselves to sleep, so I am sure the suicide rate got a little bump this year from NBC alone.
How I Met Your Mother: Season 8 Episode 16
When: Monday at 8 PM
Why: If someone had a child when this show started I can imagine them putting them to sleep at night telling the tale of “How, ‘How I Met Your Mother’ wasn’t awful once.” I think that there is probably a personal threshold for everyone, and this is a good litmus test on the individual definition of “Bad”, to point out when this hit that disappointing point; although I think we can agree when they actively started making up reasons to not introduce the mother we kind of all started zoning out.
I normally watch TV with my wife, as some of the odder things on this list will attest to, and I have a way more difficult time dropping shows than she does. I think that I could explain that this episode as Ted “dating crazy” isn’t even one of the better story arches this season, but instead will just say that my wife stood up and walked out of the room in the first several minutes of the show. She was also the person who introduced me to this show and was its biggest supporter for years.
American Dad: Season 8 Episode 11
When: Sundays at 9:30
Why: American Dad is the honey badger of TV, it just doesn’t care. I have said this a lot in the past, and will continue to say it until this show turns towards the Family Guy ways, but the more that this show acts like whatever happened last episode doesn’t matter at all is probably the best route it can follow. From randomly killing off characters and simply having them magically alive to doing a full stage play instead of a show American Dad managed to go from a watered down animated sitcom to one of the best things on TV.
Sure, this episode involving one of Rodger’s personas getting married might not have been up to the standards I have been holding the series of late; that still wasn’t enough for me to not entirely enjoy it. Between the non-talking panda bear priest and the puppet show to explain plot holes I love the way that this show isn’t afraid to swing for the fences with every joke that they make, even if they aren’t all worth remembering.
Family Guy: Season 11 Episode 12
When: Sunday at 9 PM
Why: You know that feeling that you think the rest of the world gets something that you don’t? Family Guy is like that except for wondering how anyone still thinks that this show is amusing. It seems odd that a show that was once heralded as being possibly the best and most outlandish thing on TV is now struggling to hold onto relevance. I am pretty sure that the entire collection of active fans is teenagers that hate their parents and smoke entirely too much pot.
Not to miss out on the chance to have an easy episode this week’s is a collection of tales for Valentine’s Day. To say that almost all of these sounded like old abandoned story lines that were pulled out and slightly retooled with a theme of a special day would be making it sound like there was effort in this show at any time in the last five years instead of its actively slide into heroin needle lined garbage. The longest of the forgettable stories seems to be the one about Meg getting a liver stolen, which should say where the series is when not only the majority of the plot revolves around Meg but it is also pretty much the only good part.
Archer: Season 4 Episode 5
When: Thursday at 10
Why: Read some of the descriptions on the tubs behind Archer. Beer is directly below the plastic tub containing acid. It is Archer that is why it is on the good list.
Community: Season 4 Episode 2
When: Thursday at 8 PM
Why: Because while everyone else was doing Valentine’s Day to be festive Community thought that they should just go ahead and do Halloween special instead. They might have only been given a half season, which sucks for a show that normally runs the length of a college year, but they are actively making the most of it. At this rate the Christmas episode should be this week, or soon, which is awesome because that has a habit of being one of the best of the season.
The gang goes to Pierce’s (Chevy Chase) mansion after receiving a distress call from him. It quickly turns into a haunted house adventure, which is awesome because throughout are just amazing paintings of Chevy Chase from the 80’s. True to fashion there are several giant references to events that never happened on the show, but sound like massive plot points that would have been nice to have seen. Oh Community, please never stop being a thing.
Once Upon a Time: Season 2 Episode 13
When: Sunday at 8 PM
Why: I hate this show and don’t know why I continue to watch it.
If I didn’t feel like the article was running long, and stupidly late, this week I would have said something about Californication this week and how Jorge Garcia (Hurley from Lost) was a drug dealer who accepted blowjobs. While I hope that turns into something of a recurring gig for the guy he is also over on Once as a giant with a heart of gold. Yeah, Once Upon a Time is such a deep show that it literally is just characterizing the most famous cast member as, “what if Hurley was… A GIANT!?!”
I would make an attempt to talk about what happened in the series, but since most of them are either fall into either A) not enough content for a half an hour show, or B) almost filled with plot, I feel like I can just say that this entire episode could be skipped and you would miss nothing important in the series ever. Considering that this show actively seems to be weighting more on the A selection of things it might be safer to simply drop it, save the hour, and read Wikipedia the next day.