Comic: Please Enunciate


There is an issue with PCB’s in the northeast since GE dumped them in some of the rivers in the area more than half a century ago.  Every time there is a news story about it I get excited about it thinking that at first it is going to be about a guy punching through walls and making people on bath salts look weak.  Then, for the briefest moment I think it might be about video games.  Finally I figure out that it is the sad, cancer causing, one.  It is like the stages of grief, but also involved two steps of false hope before being disappointed and losing interest.


Possible Zombie Outbreak Starts in Miami

Police shot and killed a naked man that they found eating another person’s face off near a bike path in Miami Florida.  Police yelled for the cannibal to stop, to which he replied only in grunts.  A police officer then shot him, which reportedly had no impact on the man.  The officer was then forced to shoot several more times (between three and six additional shots depending on accounts) before the man simply slumped forward.  Strangely enough the man who was eating the other was reported “dead,” and the face eaten guy was reported in “serious condition” but nothing else.  Kind of sounds odd and like a zombie cover up.

Sure, this could be something as simple as angel dust or bath salts that caused the guy to go insane and start stripping naked and eating another human, or it could be the entirely more logical thing of zombies.  The best part of this story, that wasn’t reported in every source as there are dozens of them, is that this happened right next to the Miami Herald headquarters.  Stupidly enough they were not the first people to cover the story, which is kind of stupid—and I ended up hearing about it first on Smodcast instead of reading it online.

Source: ABCNew.go